AziraLevana.com

I Am Borg...

poppied_sleep: Yoda, of Borg, I am. Assimilated, you will be. Futile, resistance is.
teknicalninja: That's the worst Yoda impression ever. Wait... "Worst impression that was."
poppied_sleep: Tek, piss off.
teknicalninja: Now that's some good Yoda!
teknicalninja: Poppied, don't hate, just because you're all Jedi and whatnot... and we're all Siths up in this... fo' real... or something like that...
poppied_sleep: Okay, how about... "I am Barney of Borg. Assimilation is fun."
teknicalninja: Poppied, I never watched Barney... So yeah, sure.
poppied_sleep: I am Dyslexia of Borg. Your ass will be laminated.
ram0ss: I am Homer of Borg. You will be ass-- Ooh, doughnuts...
teknicalninja: "I R PAKISTAN OF BORG MALE 4 C2C CHAT W FRIEND?"
the_dreamer_dreaming: "I am Jehovah of Borg. Lower your intelligence and surrender your will. Your financial and physical resources will be made to service us... Watchtower or Awake?"
poppied_sleep: We are the Smurfs. Resistance is Smurf. You will be Smurfed.
poppied_sleep: I am George W. Bush of post-9/11 Borg. Terrorism has been annihilated since 9/11. Axis of Evil, and terrorism. Weapons of Mass Destruction. Terrorism. And 9/11...

The Pogo Dildo Team

foxy.goddess* bounces around the room
shadowslacker: Going.
isis_akina: Get that pogo stick out of your ass foxy. I know you like anal, but don't you think that is going too far?
foxy.goddess: lmao
foxy.goddess: omg lmao
shadowslacker: No, I meant 'going!' like a bouncing noise.
benjipuppy: "Boing", not going.
isis_akina: A-Yup
foxy.goddess: lol Shadow
shadowslacker: Wait... The Pogo Dildo... Could be big... literally AND financially.
shadowslacker: Perhaps a new sport.
isis_akina: Shadow

shadowslacker: "And the Brazilian Pogo Dildo team have been well and truly beaten, but oddly, they don't seem to mind..."

"Got Anything There?"

x_foxy_x_goddess_x: Why, oh why, must dogs INSIST on sniffing the arses of people they know?
sadako_75: Better than sniffing the arses of strangers.
x_foxy_x_goddess_x: I mean, I understand that at first meeting, the dog needs to get acquainted. But after that?
teknicalninja: Foxy, they probably think it's a hiding
place for snacks that only people have.

"I'll Be Here All Week."

pabs_poetdelanoir: I love kids' Jeopardy 'cause I effing own!
pabs_poetdelanoir: This is a long-handled weapon with a sharp iron fixture on the top that will kill you.
shadowslacker: What is an axe?
aidos5: A sword?
pabs_poetdelanoir: Heck yes, Shadow!
pabs_poetdelanoir: You get to kill Aidos, now.
shadowslacker: Only one thing to do... Pretend the axe
is a guitar and do a solo!
shadowslacker: GADANG!
DiddlediddlediddleneeeeyyyyyyyyyrrrrrrrGAAAANG!!!
foxy.goddess: lmao Shadow
aidos5: lol
shadowslacker: Whoooooooo!
shadowslacker: Thank you, thanks......
aidos5* frowns in disgust
foxy.goddess: lmao
shadowslacker: OK, I'd like to slow things down a little bit
now...
aidos5: It's Elvis!
shadowslacker: ...Specifically, Aidos's vital signs.

Snot Funny.

pabs_poetdelanoir: *sneeze*
pabs_poetdelanoir: Oh jeese.
shadowslacker: Bless you.
pabs_poetdelanoir: Damn allergies.
pabs_poetdelanoir: Thankies.
foxy.goddess* hands Pabs a tissue
pabs_poetdelanoir: Thanks.
pabs_poetdelanoir: We don't have any.
shadowslacker: Q: Who is the boss of the hankies?
shadowslacker: A: The hankerchief.
foxy.goddess: Whoo hoo!
foxy.goddess: lol Shadopw
pabs_poetdelanoir: lol
pabs_poetdelanoir: Arg!
shadowslacker: Pabs thinks that is snot funny.
pabs_poetdelanoir: I can't stop sneezing.
pabs_poetdelanoir: And now I can't breathe.
foxy.goddess: Pabs - Have you tried Azep nasal spray?
foxy.goddess: It's excellent stuff, and better than having to
actually ingest medicine.
pabs_poetdelanoir: I can almost breathe again!
foxy.goddess: Yay for Pabs!
foxy.goddess: Ew. Can you imagine how snotty Pabs' keyboard must be?
pabs_poetdelanoir: I don't sneeze on it.
foxy.goddess: Pabs - No, but you're typing in between sneezing and blowing your nose.
pabs_poetdelanoir: It's true.
foxy.goddess: There's gotta be some transfer there somewhere.
shadowslacker: Yup.
pabs_poetdelanoir: But I'm the only one who touches this
keyboard.
pabs_poetdelanoir: So...
shadowslacker: Gives a new meaning to the 'sticky keys' function.
foxy.goddess: lol
foxy.goddess: Ew.
pabs_poetdelanoir: No shadow, that's your keyboard.
foxy.goddess: Nevermind...
shadowslacker: Shut up, Phlegminem.

oceansaura1: See, tell me if this is crass or rude or what. I am driving in traffic and I come up to a light. The guys in the next car honk and make "hey baby" remarks and gestures. So I turn to them, smile and pick my nose.
oceansaura1: I just think it's funny.
dingostolemyprescription: Ocean

wicked_wicked_poet: Oceans

wicked_wicked_poet: I was laughing so hard I couldn't type!
oceansaura1: Hahaa
oceansaura1: It's true!
oceansaura1: I do it all the time.
oceansaura1: And I wonder, "Do they still think I'm attractive?"
oceansaura1: I just stare blankly like... drrrrrrrrr...

Boobs Can Really Hurt.

panty_demon: No Fig, honey. You need to borrow my rather large but soft and gentle hands.
kill_the_thinker: Want a hand bra, Luna? My hands are free right now.
ivant2b_alone: I like itty bitty titties.
panty_demon: Oh I know boobs can hurt... Once I was
appreciating a set and almost lost an eye. It's all fun and games till someone loses an eye.
x_foxy_x_goddess_x: lmao PD
x_foxy_x_goddess_x: PD - No, I mean, when they're heavy and sore and anything hurts them.
ivant2b_alone: When breasts attack!

truthisfalse: I was born with a bad attitude.
valke2: You can get that fixed now, JJJ.
mother_moonglow: Lobotomy?
truthisfalse: Valke... I'm already fixed.
sadako_75* performs discount attitude adjustments
x_foxy_x_goddess_x: Valke's been neutered?!

truthisfalse: Sad... With baseball bats?
truthisfalse: Kinky!
sadako_75: Heh heh heh...
truthisfalse: Foxy... I'm fixed. All I do now is lie around the
house, eat, and lick myself.
valke2: Foxy, they told me it would grow back!
truthisfalse: Valke... What, your brain or penis?
valke2: JJJ - There's a difference?

fwizardfaust: all women need me
fwizardfaust: all women crave me
fwizardfaust: I am the pimp stick of love
fwizardfaust: all women need me like a junkie needs heroin
truthisfalse: Fwi... They snort you and throw up?
telephone_road_roamer: Wizard, that falls under the heading of, "a little goes a long way."

Henry's Girlfriend

aidos5: Did you ever have a girlfriend, Henry?
telephone_road_roamer: Aidos, yes. But only because she wouldn't leave me alone.
foxy.goddess: Henry

aidos5: heh
telephone_road_roamer: It was such drama when I tried to say no.
vixens_game: lmfao... That is hilarious.
foxy.goddess:

telephone_road_roamer: I wonder how she is now... She was a budding alcoholic/drug addict when we were teens.
foxy.goddess: Henry - Sounds like she was full of promise!
foxy.goddess: Henry - Oh no... It wasn't Tyop?
telephone_road_roamer: Jere, yes. It was!
aidos5: ROFL
foxy.goddess: lmao Henry
telephone_road_roamer: How did you know!
aidos5: lmao
foxy.goddess: Henry - Oh, just a gut feeling.
aidos5: Foxy is psychic.
doghealedmydyslexia: I'm surprised she didn't bite your head off and consume you immediately after.

Tits!

shadowslacker: Tits.
giant_tortoises_stalk_me: Hey, I missed a balls call!
giant_tortoises_stalk_me: Cock!
foxy.goddess: Balls.
onemoreloony: Arse.
foxy.goddess: Whoo hoo!
vulcanhippy: "Insert appendage here."
onemoreloony: Well, if you insist, Vulc.

Advice Central

teknicalninja: Get some spray paint, a lighter, and some gasoline...
x_foxy_x_goddess_x: Tek

x_foxy_x_goddess_x: Tek, you're a baaaad influence.
shadowslacker: You writing this down Poe?
x_foxy_x_goddess_x: I love you.
teknicalninja: Spray paint "I have a troll in my vagina" on their garage... and then set their mailbox on fire.
poetic_larry: I was suppose to be the desanated driver
shadowslacker: "Designated."
shadowslacker: Say it with me.
poetic_larry: yea
x_foxy_x_goddess_x: Shadow

shelatindances2004:

teknicalninja: I prefer not to say bad influence... I prefer to say "alternative source of knowledge".

Chat Room Legends

foxy.goddess: And [Phooeyptooey] is an absolute LEGEND.
teknicalninja: With a capital L
chaosmage101: Foxy, cool... Does he breathe fire, and shoot
lightning out of his ass at fundies?
foxy.goddess: lmao Chaos - Even better.
chaosmage101: Damn... now I want to be a chat legend...
teknicalninja: Chaos... It's not so great.
chaosmage101: I bet I'd have a sword and everything.
teknicalninja: Chaos... Nah.
foxy.goddess: lol Chaos
teknicalninja: Just a really sharp wit.
chaosmage101: Tek, oh, that I have.
cheese_and_nitroglycerin: He already has half of one.
chaosmage101: Razor sharp, unfortunately.
teknicalninja: Chaos... Well... I'd suggest not stroking your wit, then.
windlessabyss: I'm stroking my wit right now.
foxy.goddess: lol Wind
cheese_and_nitroglycerin: Wit... Not wick.
windlessabyss: Give me a minute, something... profound will explode all over the room.

Vocational Guidance

teknicalninja: Anyway, so now I gotta think of something to do.
foxy.goddess: Tek - Stand up comedian?
teknicalninja: Foxy... Nah, too many of the other comedians would shoot themselves after being shamed by my obvious talent.
nerves9: It happens.

Assault by Gaseous Means

shameer_km1* <arrives> Male
shameer_km1:

azira_au: Wow. shameer_km1 enters the room and starts crying. Did someone fart?
cristobal99999: I confess, Foxy.
apolitical.arsonist: Foxy, yes, I did... Behold its power!
azira_au: lol
azira_au:

cristobal99999: I farted, but I didn't think anyone noticed.
shameer_km1* <leaves the room>
apolitical.arsonist: Cristo, they didn't. My gas of He-Man magnitude covered it up.